“I felt trapped in my own body,” Williams-Paisley toldPEOPLEfor the magazine’s recent cover story.
There was so much shame involved.
I put the mic to my mouth, and nothing came out, Williams-Paisley recalled.
Kimberly-Williams Paisley.Credit:Emma McIntyre/Getty
“‘I need hot tea and vocal rest,'” she recalled thinking.
But then days turned to weeks and she could still manage only a faint whisper.
I went to self-blame," she admitted.
Kimberly Williams-Paisley.Bryan Bedder/Getty
“‘Im not breathing properly, Im not relying on my vocal training.
I was beating myself up.
“I sounded weak, and its not how I felt, she said.
Kimberly Williams-Paisley and Brad Paisley.Jason Kempin/Getty
I went into the bathroom and cried, and a couple of friends held my hand.
From there, the health crisis continued taking a mental and emotional toll on her daily life. "
I wouldnt say I had clinical depression, but I was sad,” she shared.
Williams-Paisely credits her husband country singer husbandBrad Paisley and their two sons with helping her push through.
“To see them embracing me made me feel less alone,” she added.
She was diagnosed with muscle tension dysphonia, and began physical therapy to help her body to unlock.
When her voice still didnt return, the actress began to fear that it was permanently gone.
“There were days when I grieved and sobbed,” she said.
“I wondered, Who am I without my voice?’
I still cant yell down the road.
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The whole ordeal has left her feeling changed for the better.
I feel empowered now,” she shared.”
I dont want to leave things unsaid.
I never want to take my voice for granted and I want to be brave in using it.
Williams-Paisley is next set to host of the fourth season of the Fox reality dating seriesFarmer Wants a Wife.
