One player knows better, but two others trick themselves into accepting the worst advantage ever.
Kaleb was so charismatic and such a good salesman.
And the product he was selling was himself.
Austin Lee Coon on ‘Survivor 45’.Robert Voets/CBS
He seemed like the obvious pick.
That’s the reason as impressive as Kaleb is I picked Austin.
And nothing has made me regret that decision since.
Kellie Nalbandian on ‘Survivor 45’.Robert Voets/CBS
Austin whose previousSurvivornotoriety pretty much consists ofsliding into Coach’s DMs has been nothing short of subtly spectacular.
He found his ride-or-die in Drew.
He secured second circle numbers in Julie and Dee.
Bruce Perreault on ‘Survivor 45’.Robert Voets/CBS
And in between he and Drew, they have procured, at last count, 367 idols and advantages.
Not bad for a guy who originally was not even supposed to be on this season.
But this week’s episode was a stellar one for Austin.
Katurah Topps on ‘Survivor 45’.Robert Voets/CBS
Because in the immortal words of Admiral Ackbar… it’s a trap!
But that was before this week’s journey.
As a group, they had to decide on either the food or the jewelry.
Sifu Alsup on ‘Survivor 45’.Robert Voets/CBS
If there were only two amulets still in the game, it would become a steal-a-vote.
If there was only one person with an amulet left, it became a full idol.
I think I can pretty safely say that this is the worst advantage ever.
Brando Meyer on ‘Survivor 45’.Robert Voets/CBS
Because all holding it does is incentivize people to get rid of you.
What kind of advantage is that?
ZERO PERCENT!!!
Brando Meyer and Kendra McQuarrie on ‘Survivor 45’.Robert Voets/CBS
J Maya and Kellie accepting this advantage was the height of folly.
Which is why it was so brilliant of producers to (once again) add it into the game.
I like to think of this advantage as theSurvivorversion of Walter White.
Brando Meyer on ‘Survivor 45’.Robert Voets/CBS
He was a character we all rooted for.
And then he started making meth.
And then he started killing people.
Survivorplayers are also conditioned conditioned to always go for the advantage.
It doesn’t matter how many times producers write the word BEWARE on one.
As long as your name is notBrandon Donlon, you’re opening it.
That’s becauseSurvivorcasts risk-takers.
Not only that, but the show indirectly shames those whodon’tgo for it.
Do you want to come off as big and bold, or timid and safe?
Forget about the Beware Advantage.
And that’s not a comedic exaggeration I am making.
I honestly believe that to be true.
And the creative potential out of that is tremendous.
Which brings us back to Austin’s decision.
J Maya and Kellie could not help but initiate the shiny package sitting in front of them.
And I don’t blame them!
It’s everySurvivorfans' dream to get an idol or advantage, and here it was!
But Austin saw the big picture.
(Unfortunately for him, the majority ruled, so he was forced to take it.)
Instead, Austin was prepared to make the tough call, and that’s what great players do.
One of the two.
Okay, let’s hit on a few other quick things from episode 5 ofSurvivor 45.
Not so mellow yellow
Even after the tribe swap, Lulu remains endlessly fascinating.
We saw Kaleb working everyone and working them HARD.
But while Kellie may be the glue, Uncle Bruce is definitely the Krazy Glue.
I don’t really understand what Bruce keeps doing with the weird accents and facial expressions and stuff.
It’s so odd, and doesn’t really seem natural.
But all the zaniness in the world can’t mask that Bruce can be bossy.
For example: “You want to talk about it or you want to do it?”
is not something I would ever say onSurvivor.
I think I made it to, like, seven seconds.
Worst seven seconds of my life.
Couldn’t do it.
Anyone that gives birth to another human being is entitled to all the presents they damn c’mon.
I don’t know, maybe some hand warmers to thaw their palms out.
The point is: Why argue that?
There’s simply no reason!
Should be interesting to see how that develops.
It was a scary moment to be sure, but only a moment.
And not terribly surprising.
“I don’t want to get pulled.
I’d rather get my ass voted out,” Jake told us.
“If I go out of this game, I’m going out fighting, not falling.”
(Now yo stop falling.)
“Now I respect him even less,” sighed Dee.
“I do too,” agreed Jane.
In fairness, what was he supposed to do?
It’s not like he made a point of telling Sifu he didn’t vote for him.
Sifu asked, Sean answered.
I don’t think he was intentionally throwing anyone under the bus.
He just answered the question.
The way he oh-so-obviously kept bringing up to people in theleast casual manner possiblehow he had an idol.
And if he did, my next response would have been “Show me the parchment.”
And yet they bought it anyway!
Why would you want to purposely create an enemy in the game with a merge right around the corner?
Seems way too risky and unwise to me.
Do the worm
Kendra not being able to swallow a worm makes me miss the eating challenge.
My only advice would have been to lean into the concept even more.
Put some ropes in there that they have to go over or under.
Or put a barrel of hay on the bottom level they have to make their way through.
Just put more barricades and obstacles into the obstacle course.
Make it a crazy fun house!
After all, didn’tMike Whitesay to makeSurvivormore fun!
Anyway, this was a solid 1.0 version.
Now I want them to aspunmaster J Mayamight say level up.
(Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
It wasn’t clear at first.
“But that is neither here nor there.
The important thing was to attempt to figure out what the hell Brando was doing.
I really don’t get it.
Brando offered to give Drew his Shot in the Dark if Drew would vote out Kendra instead of him.
And Drew refused it.
None of this makes any sense!
The whole thing was messier than Marvin (another dated reference, I know).
Or was it a dog face?
It was all super confusing.
And more than a little bit scary.
The big question was: Which side Emily was going to pick?
And once Austin showed her the amulet from his journey, it seemed to seal the deal.
And I can’t help but believe that played a part in the nickname attachment for season 45.
And what a mistake that nickname was!
Or goodies like Jeff Probst explaining why youdon’t need a “sob story"to get cast onSurvivor.
Or goodies likean exclusive deleted scene of Sifu delving into his painful past.
Or goodies like our exit interview with Oak Park Brandon.
They’re all yours.
Go enjoy and I’ll be back next week with another scoop of the crispy.
