I dreamt that some guy was trying to rip my teeth out, notes Parisa calmly.
Good Lord, thats not a dream thats a nightmare!
While that also sounds like a traumatic dream, Natalie thinks it means that shes feeling nurturing.
Parisa, Grant, Serafiena, Bailey, Natalie, and Zoe have a finance-themed date on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Anyhow, Chloie is hoping that this week, Grant will imprint on her.
ABC
Today, were going to learn about finance!
That said, many of the questions arent based on facts.
Alexe isn’t afraid of being kink-shamed on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Rose and Grant both say $20k (!
The most soul-shaking revelation of the day, however, comes from Alexe.
(I’ve always wanted to try one of those.
Grant toasts with a kitty cup on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Hold up for a second what the hell is the Bachelor drinking?
I have a lot of questions.
The Bachelor LOVES it.
Zoe tattles to Grant on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
I think thats the most that Ive laughed in a long time, he admits.
Everyones having a great time… except Zoe.
I was so uncomfortable today, she laments to the other women.
Parisa for the win on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
She starts tearing up, and the other contestants do their best to comfort her.
But she doesnt say it quietly enough, because Zoe hears it, and she does NOT love it.
What a rude f—ing comment!
Alexe (center) has a good cry on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
But Zoe knowsexactlyhow to get revenge.
And naturally, Zoe presents the situation to Grant without taking any accountability for her past actions.
Im not here to, like, point [fingers].
Grant greets Carolina by a rented private jet on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Girl, thats EXACTLY why youre here!
The Bachelor assures Zoe that this behavior is not cool with him.
I dont want to see people throwing jabs, he continues.
Grant and Carolina get their feet wet on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Dont stop being you.
If being you offends other people, you shouldnt stop.
They seal their conversation with a kiss, which means Zoe got exactly what she wanted.
Grant gives Carolina the date rose on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Nice work, toots.
Grants conversation with Juliana is much more lighthearted, and it, too, ends with a smooch.
But the date rose goes to…
Congrats, Parisa!
Lisa Vanderpump and her pooch make a grand entrance on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
We have to be kind to each other, he says sternly.
With that, he leaves, and the speculation begins.
Did anybody have a conversation with him about this?
Juliana is not picking up what Carolina’s putting down on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Juliana asks the group.
When no one fesses up, she turns to Zoe and asks point-blank if it was her.
Im allowed to chat whatever I want to chat, Zoe retorts.
Grant and Litia have a romantic date at City Hall on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
But she essentially confesses a few minutes later, tearfully telling the women, Everyones so mean.
Emotions are still running high the next morning.
Every girl here is crying because of what happened at the end of the night, explains Serafiena.
Grant and Litia FaceTime her mom on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Yep, its private jet to Vegas time!
and skip ahead to their first stop in Sin City.
Awww yeah, say it with me, rose lovers: Love is like a leap of faith!
Jack, Keith, Jonathan, Gary, and Grant on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
I have never jumped off anything, says Carolina, before she and Grant take the plunge.
Carolina may be an attention-seeking diva, but at least shes honest about it.
There isnt enough chlorine in the world, rose lovers.
It’s a backyard prom on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
But enough about me.
Tonight is about Carolina, who is ready to Open UpTM about some issues that can turn people off.
Tearfully, she tells Grant that when she was 13, she started getting tremors.
Carolina confronts Grant on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Carolina says she can now control her condition with medication.
Grant is moved to tears by her story.
If we do get married, no matter what you need, Im always going to put you first.
Rose makes no sense on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Nowthatis a perfect answer.
Go on and give her the date rose, sir!
They end the night with a make out session as the lights of Vegas twinkle in the background.
Parisa and Serafiena are unhappy prom queens on ‘The Bachelor’.ABC
Everybody, kindly send poor Beverly some good thoughts.
Theyre probably going to hear my dog voice today, admits the Bachelor.
Sitting with Parisa, Chloie, Rose, and Juliana, Carolina vents her frustrations.
The other women do NOT love it.
Suddenly, the mansion door opens and in walks Sarafiena and Dina.
Though they were both on the group date, only Litia gets to join the Bachelor for dinner.
I guess producers didnt have enough time to secure two more chairs for the table.
Our Bachelor has now cried twice in this episode alone.
Normalize men showing their emotions on television!
Awww, now shes crying, too!
They need to start putting tissue boxes at the table on these dinner dates.
Just kidding Litia gets the date rose, too.
Cutting back to the mansion, we once again hear the sounds of sobbing.
Ill admit it, rose lovers: At first, I was certain that Carolina made it up.
After all, how many conversations about the Bachelor happen off-camera?
Especially juicy ones like that?
More on that in a minute.
For now, its time for the final cocktail party of the week.
But this one has some very special guests:
The way I squealed, rose lovers!
ItsThe Golden BachelorettesJack, Keith, Jonathan, andGaryare here to help Grant throw a themed party.
Okay ladies, you heard Jack its time to party!
Inside, though, Carolina is, in her own words, spiraling.
Maybe I dont mean anything to this guy, she frets.
I know I have a rose, but Im about to leave.
Thats exactly what she does.
The Bachelor does NOT love it.
The poor guy tries to guess who made the comment (Was it Bailey?
Was it Litia?)
but Carolina refuses to divulge her source.
I dont want this to be a thing, she insists.
LOLOL, girl thatsexactlywhat you want!
What happened next made my jaw drop, rose lovers.
I was certain certain!
that Rose was going to deny ever saying it, but she does not.
Her response to Grant is beyond lame:
Bish, like.
Why would I say that?
Grant asks her, clearly frustrated.
I wouldnt do that… Thats like some player s—.
She does eventually apologize.
Honestly, that wasnt a good moment for me, she says, stating the obvious.
Grants all, Yeah, well talk about it, but hes obviously 1-800-OVER-IT.
The clock is about to run out.
Dont they look happy?
With that, its rose ceremony time.
Rose, for one, knows her journey is about to end.
And damn, I was talking about me.
Thats right, honey.
Rose ceremony roll call!
Zoe, Juliana, Alexe, Dina, Natalie, Serafiena, and Rose (!)
join Litia, Carolina, and Parisa in the Circle of SafetyTM.
That means we must say goodbye to Alli Jo, Bailey, and (sob) Chloie.
The Bachelorairs Mondays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC.
